What if our life also had a GPS device, with the Favorite “Go Home” pre-set in it? We wouldn’t have to worry about what route a.k.a. decisions to take, since the path for us would already have been set! Worst case, even if we take a wrong decision / turn, it would automatically do route re-calculation for us! We wouldn’t have to worry about what direction life is taking, since our destination would already be pre-set in that GPS device. All we would need to do is to follow what the GPS device is saying, and life would be good. Wishful thinking … Ehh!! Well not really, turns out our lives indeed have a GPS device…
……route re-calculation…
Oh God, not again!!! I don’t know for how many times had I already heard this voice today. Probably this would have been some 7th / 8th time……but then as long as it takes me to where I want to go, I won’t blame it. Given my awesome sense of distance and direction I won’t actually mind thanking it…
….Continue on the highlighted route for 20 miles…then take a right turn …
Wow, 20 miles on this straight road. This should be nice (I was actually thankful that for next 20 miles I won’t be able to take a wrong turn!!), and then a right turn even nicer – no yielding way to straight traffic and hence no decisions. Life is good!
I grabbed my chai tea latte from the car holster and took a sip – sipping this one is pure bliss (sitting here in US, amongst black coffee(s) and tea(s), the chai tea latte is like, my desi tea in videsh). With chai tea latte’s satiating taste on my taste buds, my mind started to go over the happenings of past few days. Last few weeks had indeed been eventful, and there was lot to contemplate upon…
Most recent being the decision to experience the shopping frenzy on the eve of Thanksgiving Day. Being the federal and a public holiday with a long weekend, it is one of the busiest periods for shopping in the USA. Along with few of my friends I, like all others, was waiting in queue for JC Penny store to open. It was -4 degree Centigrade outside and snow showers were beginning to fall. Since, neither me nor my friends knew if we would be here for the next thanksgiving eve, so we had decided come what may, we will enjoy this one to the extent possible, and so unless weather department issued a warning to stay indoors, we were determined not to let anything dampen our spirits. There was a 4-year-old girl standing next to me, in the queue, along with her Mom. We started talking (I and the 4-year-old…). Her name was Lori and she had come to do some thanksgiving shopping, along with her parents and younger sis. We spoke about her school, her friends, her pink dress, the magic wand she was carrying, what she likes etc. etc.. She suddenly said, “Can I ask you a question?” I said, “Sure, definitely”. Lori said, “Will you be my friend?” I said, “I sure will, my name is Kapila” and we shook hands. Lori then asked me where am I from? Where is India…what language do we speak there… can I speak some Hindi to her, and finally I taught her to say “How are you” in Hindi. We talked a little bit more about where is India and who all do I have in my family (and all this with 4-year-old Lori), and when the doors of store opened at 05:00 pm, we bid each other good-bye. It was nice to meet a smart and intelligent 4-year-old girl while standing in a queue. She surely has a great future ahead.
Talking to Lori a question crossed my mind – Why did I come to US? I did not cherish such a wish ever. Mom Dad are in India, my friends are in India, and work there was also not bad!! Could have easily sustained myself in India as well. So why? No-one forced me to come to US. Was there a prompt (from life’s GPS) and I followed?
What if the JC Penny store doors had to open half an hour later, and Lori had asked me this question? Though I would have made something up to respond to her, but I honestly had no answer…I just went with the flow and came here! Was it the right thing to do? Well, don’t know….
Thanksgiving came and went, had a good time observing the shopping frenzy and the long queues. US actually lives for shopping and enjoying. Seems like they truly believe “sab moh maya hai…” and hence just plunge themselves deeply into these pleasures of life, and courtesy the developed country they are, they surely can afford this!! (Won’t go into good or bad aspect of this….)
I glance at the GPS, oops I was over-speeding. I push the brake to get back within the speed limit…and back to chai tea latte once more…
Couple of weeks ago, I had gone to Florida to attend a conference. It was hosted in a grand resort of Orlando, and was attended by the biggies of the profession. Seeing for the first time such opulence, the conference venue, rooms and the attendees, I felt like if I had gotten there by an error or fluke! I actually thought let me go back to my room, shut it from inside and come out only on the day to catch my flight back. But then I somehow gathered the courage to venture out – thinking that my company has spent dollars sending me here, and lot of my colleagues are interested in seeing what comes out of it, and so I have to be little braver than my usual self, and so I went to the welcome dinner for the first time attendees. It was in a big conference room. There was a big chandelier in the center of room and a huge stack of salad, surrounded by snacks and drink bar. The room had chairs and tables arranged all over for seating, but people were walking in, socializing and heading straight to the bar counter. As I walked in, I honestly didn’t know which direction to take, where to go, whom to talk to!! God, why was I here…
Anyways, “Kapila let’s see what happens, I am sure this is going to be fun!” I motivated myself with these words which, though, didn’t seem to have any meaning at that time! Then suddenly one of the organizers came and introduced himself, and we started chatting. Ok, so this can’t be so bad I thought…..He then went to greet someone else, and co-incidentally the welcome address started at same time. I sat on one of the chairs in the front row… I didn’t want to miss seeing or hearing single word you see…Welcome address happened and concluded and people again stalked the bar counter. Come on people, some of you can remain seated!! I was one of the few people left seated. Just then, another organizer came and sat with me (he had been observing me for sometime, and I learned later that he was the co-chair at the conference). He introduced himself, and I did the same. He was glad to see participation from my field, and then before leaving said to me: “Girl, don’t sit in the corner! Go and meet people, talk to them….!!”. Ok! Thank you for the advice, though I know this already, but then since I wasn’t exactly following it so I will take it from you. But I have a fundamental question Mr. Co-chair (I said to myself) – These are so BIG people (in size), and all standing!!! How do I walk upto them and talk? … Well I figured a way around, I went not in the crowd, but near the crowd…and starting greeting people there… and it turns out, met a nice lady there. She was related to my field, and on the last day of the conference made me an offer to join her someday. I got to learn some really good things in the conference and met with some interesting people, and this being my first conference in US, will remain memorable forever.
….. In 2 miles, take a right turn….and my mind snaps back to the road.
… In 50 feet take a right turn, stay on right and take the ramp towards….OOPS that’s complicated!! I stay-put and carefully drive not to take a wrong turn yet again…
….drive to highlighted route for 5 miles, and then take a left towards Bowing drive…Oh, I know Bowing drive so life’s good…Another 5 miles, and I am almost home..
My mind started to map my experience in conference, vis-à-vis, to my question about coming to US. At the hotel room door, in the conference I had a choice – choice of skipping the welcome dinner and peacefully relaxing in my room, or doing what I did…. I went with the flow – since I came to Florida for the conference, I went to attend it and things did fall in place after that.
Before coming to US also, I had a choice (though my lazy, and don’t ask me to take decisions type of mind, didn’t view it that way at that time), of staying back in India or going with the flow. I went with the flow and came here….I still don’t know the purpose of coming here (or whether it was right or wrong decision), and probably won’t know anything till some point in future, but then I do believe, or should I say hope, that had I not done this my life’s GPS would have been saying ….“…route re-calculation…”
“Arriving at destination Home…Your destination is on the right” and finally I was home.
Taking the last sip of chai tea latte this is what stuck me –
All our lives are like GPS devices, where the path (to home / life’s destination) is pre-set, and the GPS gives us directions of that path. All we need to do – is to catch the directions which GPS is giving us… and that as it turns out is the most difficult part, probably because it comes by letting go. Letting go of the control we all want on our lives, on our circumstances, and to an extent on people around us. The moment we let go of all this control, we tend to be free, free to hear what our GPS is saying, free to go with the flow. By default that movement is supposed to take us to a fulfilled life and to give our life its fullest expression, because you see the path is already set.
The moment we go against what the life’s GPS is showing us or fail to hear it, it says “route re-calculation…” and things get little difficult for us….not the way we would want them to be, because now you have to put in some extra miles to get on the original track you were supposed to be on… and we then complain. I guess it’s at this point the historical battle between action and destiny gets resolved: “we need to act, and we can exert the will to act, or not to, to realize the destiny meant for us”.
Eureka! Eureka! 